Struggling to connect with your lover’s friends? See the things to make them like you
Are you currently in a relationship where your partner’s friends don’t like you? Is it really a big deal for them to like you? Are you worried this might lead to a breakup in your relationship? See the things to do to make them like you.
Meeting your partner’s friends can be extremely beneficial to your relationship’s future. If your partner is eager for you to meet their friends and family, there’s a high probability they’re serious about you.
In an ideal world, their friends would warmly welcome you into the group. That isn’t always the case, though. So, what are the things to do if your partner’s friends don’t like you?
- 1 Is it important that my partner’s friends like me?
- 2 What are the things to do if my partner’s friends don’t like me?
- 2.1 Take a Backward Step
- 2.2 Give it some time
- 2.3 Consider it from their point of view
- 2.4 Get to know them as individuals rather than just your partner’s friends
- 2.5 Try not to take things too personally and be understanding
- 2.6 Look for anything in common between your partner, you and their friends
- 2.7 Talk to your partner about the situation
- 2.8 Don’t Push It And Let It Go
- 2.9 Related
Is it important that my partner’s friends like me?
It might be a huge problem in your relationship if your new partner’s friends dislike you. For example, your partner’s friends’ opinions may weigh heavily on them and potentially turn them against you.”
It may come across as harsh. However, according to a 2017 study published in the Journal of Social and Personal Relationships, persons who don’t get along with their partner’s friends are more likely to divorce/break up.
When your friends and your partner don’t get along, the study’s authors say, it can cause some uncertainty in your relationship. It can also be a cause of persistent strain.
What are the things to do if my partner’s friends don’t like me?
There are things you can do to reduce friction between you and your partner’s friends, which is excellent news. According to experts, here are a few things you may do if your new partner’s acquaintances don’t seem to like you
Take a Backward Step
If your partner’s buddies are making you uncomfortable, taking a step back and removing yourself from the situation is a good approach. Taking a moment to breathe and relax, will help you avoid acting out in ways that will make matters worse.
You can also try to figure out where their bad thoughts against you stem from when you have some alone time. Is there something you’re doing wrong? Are you coming across as a jerk? Or are they feeling threatened by your presence in your partner’s life? Maybe they are just feeling like you are stealing your partner’s attention away from them.
Give it some time
This is one of the wise things to do if your partner’s friends don’t like you. “Time heals all,” they say. In this scenario, that might be the best alternative.
Maybe you just didn’t click straight away or it was just a lousy first impression. Whatever the situation, sometimes all you need is time. Things always seem to work out in the end.
Consider it from their point of view
It’s vital to realize that you’re not the only one affected when you enter into a relationship. Your family and friends relationships shift as well. Your partner and you may be ready to embark on a new chapter in your lives, but their friends may not be.
If this is the case, your partner’s buddies might not be as friendly as they could be. If your partner chooses to spend more time with you than with them, this can happen. Things should even out over time.
However, it’s totally OK to urge your partner to spend time with their friends while you spend time with yours in the early stages. It’s all about making a conscious effort to find balance and build a healthy dynamic early on.
Get to know them as individuals rather than just your partner’s friends
Do your best to get to know your partner’s friends and be sincere in your approach. If they detect your deception, they may despise you even more. The most important thing to remember is that you don’t have to go out of your way to make people like you.
Regardless of what you do, people will like or dislike you. It’s quite acceptable to keep things simple. Offer to have them over for dinner and then do something enjoyable, like play some games.
The more people get to know you and the more shared experiences you have with them, the stronger your personal bonds will become.
Try not to take things too personally and be understanding
People become provoked for a variety of reasons. You’ll probably never know what ignites someone unless you get to know them. The main thing to remember here is not to take it personally if you triggered your partner’s buddy in some manner.
Something about you may be bringing up some unresolved feelings of insecurity, distrust, fear, or annoyance. While you do not influence how other people feel about you, recognize that triggers are an indication that something needs to be settled in this scenario.
Look for anything in common between your partner, you and their friends
The company a person keeps might reveal a lot about them. If you and your partner get along well with each other’s friends, there must be something you and their pals have in common.
Find out what that is. You may share your favourite music, a favourite sports team, or simply enjoy drinking at the same bar. This is one of the wise things to do if your partner’s friends don’t like you.
You don’t need to be best friends with them. However, if you can identify just one thing in common with someone, it can go a long way.
Talk to your partner about the situation
Communication is one of the most important aspects of every successful relationship. So, if you’re having problems with your partner’s pals, tell them. Use “I” statements to explain oneself as much as possible to reduce the drama.
“I think your friends don’t like me,” for example, will make your partner feel less defensive than “your friends despise me!” This talk with your lover can reveal a lot about what your relationship is going to be like.
If your new spouse cherishes their friends’ opinions, especially if they are negative about you, they may truly believe them. When this happens, you may find yourself in a situation where your partner refuses to support or defend you.
Don’t Push It And Let It Go
Forcing things to work out, no matter how much you want it to,won’t make anyone happy. You and your partner do not have to be friends with the same people. It can make your life easier, but it isn’t required. The pressure of the circumstance will likely diminish over time, allowing for the possibility of repaired connections. Even if it may sound cliche, “what will be, will be”
It’s your partnership at the end of the day. There’s no need to be concerned if your partner is really interested in you and isn’t readily swayed by their friend’s thoughts. It’s unrealistic to expect everyone to like you. You should be alright as long as that one person you truly care about does.